It's a funny things almosts
A job you almost got, a house you almost owned, a decision you almost made
A boy, you almost loved. 

The feeling of missing something you almost had, memories you could have made - it's a feeling that's hard to describe. 
Coming this close, to everything you ever wanted, being able to breathe it in & wrap it around you, your heart let itself drop that barrier of protection for just a fleeting moment, but it was long enough to let hope creep in. 
It's different to the yearning you feel for something you want - when you have a dream, you have fire, you know that you can work toward it, you have excitement & determination, passion & you are fearless in your pursuit. 

To miss something you almost had, is like someone pouring ice on your fire. It won't put it out straight away, it will be a shock to its core, slowly diminishing, while the flames around it flicker with hope and struggle to stay alight; all the while knowing that it's fighting a hopeless battle & eventually going to go out & all you will be left with are the ashes of almost.

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